MY MUSE AS A COACH

This is an old journal. Spoiler alert!

My bowlers are like my 'babies'. I even knew them more than I do of my own children. I had them before I had my own and I always believe that because I treat them as my own, Allah finally answered my prayer to have my own chidren.
Some of them are competing in a national tournament right now and I'm having the blues. I'm just not with them and I blamed myself because I was too chicken to stand up against those in power. Like my children, its hard to let them be with other guardians aka other coaches. But no more of that.
What are they doing right now? Do they play well? Its tearing me apart. I always believe that my babies need us when they play in any tournaments, my husband and me. I also believe that they can do better when we are around. The fact is, most of them have been with us for 5 years now. Its like we know them inside out on the lanes. Of course I might be blowing my own horns here but you see there is a chemistry between us and the players. Only a few people would understand this. Others would think that this is stupid. Of course our picks are different altogether. Some prefer my husband and some would prefer me.
I will never go so far saying that my bowlers will not win gold medals when we are not with them. They can achieve anything because we give them everything. I just feel so damn frustrated right now for not being there and I wonder what if...
But then, you never know how the bowlers really feel about you because they are after all teenagers. They might love you today and scorn you the next day especially when they are on top of the world. My husband experienced this first hand, sadly to say for a few times. Just like 'kacang lupakan kulit'.
This feeling will soon pass but I just want to vent it out...


Latest update!
Some bowlers did very well in the tournament. They won a lot of medals. One bowler even scored his first ever perfect game... and you wonder if this further seal the consensus that our presence is no longer needed in any tournament...

By Aunty Lin

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